Overuse Injuries: Hand and Skin

According to a book called High Performance Cycling, by Asker E. Jeukendrup, the two issues which flared up for me during the Nutmeg Criterium have names:
Cyclist's Palsy: "The common cause is a compression of the fibers of the ulnar nerve as it enters the hand through the canal of Guyon, which is situated on the medial (little finger) side of the wrist.. Ulnar nerve compression producing sensory symptoms or muscular weakness has been recognized in cyclists for more than 100 years with the first case reported in 1896."
Third Testes: "Subcutaneous nodules are unique to elite and pro male cyclists. They typically form on each side of the midline, just posterior to the scrotum. Because of their appearance and position, cyclists sometimes refer to them as a "third testis". The lesions are pseudocysts that contain little cellular material. They develop in areas of aseptic pressure necrosis in the superficial peroneal fascia and are due to chronic microtrauma of the perineum related to pressure from the saddle.."
I have both. Two medial fingers are numb and weak. (So much for "ergonomic handlebars!)
Aaaaaand there's blood in my shorts. It finally ruptured tonight while watching Sopranos. Must have been when Phil Leotardo's head was crushed like a melon. Now I gotta worry about infection too!
So in summary.. racing on the wet Nutmeg course with 100+ guys, many of whom should be named "Shifty", "Drifty" and "Brakey", caused me to have a white knuckle death grip on the bars.. And I raced so hard for so long on the nose of my saddle that I mutilated the soft tissues behind the nutsack. Oh joy.